Life choices that we make can produce lots of good. Or, they can produce a deadly spiral in life. This post discusses how to move toward the better of those outcomes.
The Spiral
A tenet of the personal growth literature is some form of “I’m responsible for the outcomes in my life.”
For instance, Covey’s Habit One speaks of being proactive. That is, of being responsible for life outcomes. Those life outcomes largely reflect our decisions, not external conditions.
As such, we make conscious choices based on deeply-held values. Hence, we are intentional. And, we’re driven by character.
In contrast, when we’re reactive, we fall into a deadly spiral in life of blaming, and of being a victim. Over time, being reactive instead of being responsible traps us right where we currently are in life.
We choose the gift of a sound character by the intentional choices we make each day to do the right thing. proverbsforprofessionals.net
The Precept
Unsurprisingly, Solomon addresses the flaw of being reactive. In fact, in Proverbs 19.3 he walks through the steps, the decision processes, of reactivity.
Here’s how it plays out:
1). My lack of character development produces foolish thinking
2). That foolish character, in turn, makes really poor choices
3). Following the law of sowing and reaping, my poor lifestyle choices lead to bad outcomes
4). What to do? Well, I get mad at God, that’s what!
Consequently, a deadly spiral of foolish thinking, poor choices, bad outcomes, and reactivity.
I blame God for the difficulties I’m facing. But, for the most part, those difficulties are of my own making! Now, that’s a rational response!
My foolish choices really mess up my life. In response, I get mad at God! Proverbs 19.3 paraphrase proverbsforprofessionals.net
A Way Out!
Solomon identifies my lack of character development as root cause for this reactive lifestyle.
As a result of an under-developed character, I’m not just mildly irritated at these life outcomes. Instead, I fret.
The Hebrew word for “fret” in Proverbs 19.3 appears as “wrath” in Proverbs 19.12. Therefore, I’m really angry at God. For a situation that I caused!
So, what’s the cure for reactivity? In Proverbs 19.8 we’re told that character building is good for the soul. And, we find good in life by developing experiential insight.
Repeatedly, we’re urged to be transformed by intentional character development. For some examples, see the following verses in Proverbs: 2.2, 3.3, 4.4, 6.21, and 7.3.
In each case, we’re asked to take to heart the precepts. Thus, let the precepts change who we are inside of us.
Also repeatedly, Solomon warns of bad outcomes for a poor character. See Proverbs 6.32, 7.7, 9.4, 10.21, 11.12, and 12.11. In short, when we choose to grow our character, we choose to avoid lots of problems!
If your experiences are teaching you that “the rules don’t apply to me” then you should seek out different experiences. proverbsforprofessionals.net
Apply This Today!
Knowing I’m responsible, and actually being responsible, are two different things.
When I grow my character I open my life to lots of good outcomes.
I will relive – repeatedly – a deadly spiral in life until I recognize what’s happening.
More importantly, I relive until I choose to break that spiral by way of personal growth. Therefore, choose life!
One more thought. There’s no constructive life outcome for directing anger at God for life circumstances.