Listen well, finding root cause, and responding with kindness and empathy are ways to dramatically grow leadership influence.
The entries in this blog post are from LinkedIn posts I made from March 15 to March 21, 2021. The topics covered include: mentoring, a willingness to listen, humility, leadership influence, finding root cause, and self-control. The most impactful leaders combine these qualities because they know it’s a way to dramatically grow leadership influence.
Multiplied learning
I multiply what I already know by drawing insight from a mentor.
However, there’s no multiplied learning without:
1). Preparation for the mentoring session,
2). Humility to admit I don’t know it all, and,
3). A willingness to ask for assistance.
Most critically, I improve my chances of deep learning by prior reflection to build insight. That way, I have a base for new insights when speaking with a mentor.
Similarly, Proverbs 20.5 says advice is like a deep well – it requires my insight to draw out deep advice from a mentor.
Hence, with a growth mindset I deliberately reflect to build insight. Then, I use those insights in conversation with a mentor to multiply the learning I have already.
Do you believe you can learn? Are you willing to ask for help? If Yes, then you can enjoy multiplied learning.
Are you listening?
I bet you’ve said this before – when frustrated! With no visible signal of listening, we assume the worst.
Fact is, if there’s no listening there’s no awareness of a need to change. Hence, no chance for learning. I must be teachable if I’m to be wise.
Likewise, Proverbs 19.20 says being open to sound counsel helps make us wise – later in life.
Unfortunately, becoming wise takes time. It’s not like receiving a shot for a virus. Thus, “are you listening?” is only the starting point for a life-long journey.
So, be teachable. But, expect becoming wise to take time and require the development of insight.
What should I say?
Leaders desire influence. To be influential, be thoughtful and deliberate in speaking.
Kindness and thoughtfulness show humility. And humility, in turn, produces leadership influence.
Similarly, Proverbs 18.12 contrasts the hurtful words of the proud with the humility of those who are influential, hence respected.
Careless, angry, or flippant responses destroy leadership influence. Instead, stop and ask “What should I say?” When I combine thoughtfulness with humility I can dramatically grow leadership influence.
Why did I say that?
Finding root cause brings positive change. What’s root cause for words that attack the spirit of another?
I have lots of excuses, like “look at what they did/said.” Or, there’s a stressed history between us. Regardless, I can find reasons to ignore my inappropriate responses.
Taking ownership of my responses forces me look inside. To be self-aware and self-reflective. Often, what’s revealed is pride.
Proverbs 16.18 says pride precedes my attack on someone’s spirit, which is ultimately self-destructive.
So, “Why did I say that?” is clear when I honestly reflect on my character and my intentions.
Did I really say that?
“Choose your words wisely” is easy to say. But, hard to live!
Especially if you’re like me – prone to saying whatever comes to mind. Hence, I find myself saying “did I really say that?”
Unfortunately, self-awareness isn’t enough. It’s inadequate to recognize, after the fact, that I’ve messed up – again.
Self-awareness must be paired with self-control, in the moment. I must choose words that build a relationship.
Similarly, Proverbs 15.4 says healing words are life giving but perverse words attack the spirit.
So, step one is to consider more than that first thought before responding. That thinking-on-my-feet increases the chances of a response that heals.
Which facts?
Wise leaders make good use of the facts during decision making. As such, Proverbs 15.2 says it’s wise to use knowledge correctly.
Can you ever get all the facts? No, there’s always uncertainty.
Are there alternate facts? Not among rational people.
Are there non-factual considerations? Of course.
Will others interpret the same data differently? Yes!
So, what’s a leader to do? Be discerning about the fundamentals of right and wrong. Make thoughtful use of various decision models. Seek wise counsel.
Then – decide! That’s a key reason you’ve been appointed!
Thought leadership is like growing fruit!
Huh? How are those two related? Well, thought leadership involves:
1). Planting/sowing then waiting for responses/reaping.
2). Consistent, hard work.
3). Dealing with the uncontrollable (like rain for a farmer).
4). Seasonality – messages work better at some times than at others.
5). Attention to detail that impacts the quality of the end product.
Similarly, Proverbs 18.20 says I’m filled with the fruit of what I share with others. Thus, thought leadership is inherently satisfying.
So, be the leader who consistently sows impactful thought leadership in regard to culture, strategy, and the organization’s path forward.
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