Some choices are a hard NO! Friendships that snare us are one example.
What’s the problem here?
Sometimes a warning cones with a rationale. In Proverbs 22.24 we’re warned about being a companion, thus building a friendship, with someone who has issues with self-control.
Here the problem is anger and fury. That anger shows out in bad behavior, for example, Proverbs 29.22, “… angry … stirs up strife … abounds in transgressions.”
Don’t be friends with someone who has recurring issues with self-control because their influence is spiritually destructive. Proverbs 22.24-25, paraphrase. proverbsforprofessionals.net
Is it really that bad?
But, why no friendship with them? That’s answered in Proverbs 22.25 – we risk picking up their bad habits “… you might learn his ways …”
Worse yet, the other person’s lack of self-control influences us so deeply that it becomes “… a snare to your soul.” Thus, beyond no self-control, the damage reaches into, and corrupts, our deepest spiritual self.
In short, we must be careful about who influences us. That is, beware of who we select as a role model.
No self-control means no boundaries over our words or actions. Proverbs 25.28 paraphrase. proverbsforprofessionals.net
How did we get here?
But, why do we make bad choices about influencers? Reasons include:
1). A lack of discernment
2). Naively saying “I’ll only pick up the good in them”
3). Overconfidence in our ability to withstand bad influence
4). Our simpleminded inability to discern likely outcomes from the bad influence.
For other examples, see Proverbs 28.7, “… a companion of the riotous shames his father” and Proverbs 29.25, “The fear of man brings a snare …”
The warning in Proverbs 22.24 encourages us to be selective with friendships so we’re not snared by a poor role model. Similarly, Proverbs 19.27 tells us to continue listening to good advice or, alternatively, to stop taking bad advice! Ultimately, we become who we hang out with, for good or for bad. Thus, Proverbs 13.20 “… walk with wise … be wise … a companion of fools will be destroyed.”
Those who are angry, foolishly overconfident, and have a destructive lifestyle are not positive role models! So, move on!
Apply This Today!
We should be selective about who and what we allow into our life because the corruption is much deeper than a few bad habits. Don’t go there!
Many other problems, other than anger, stem from a lack of self-control. The principle of Proverbs 22.24, about being selective with who influences us, applies to those problems as well.
A Question to Consider
What criteria do you use when deciding who gets to be part of your inner circle of influencers?
I’m Dale Young. My posts share the balanced life to build wise character and guide wise behavior.
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